George Bush is of German descent

If you don't see the connection then you are totally brainwashed.

Annnouncements:

Although Goebbels Gryboski is trying to stop us, we are in the midst of trying to expand our truth-telling empire. As we all know, the Mason Cable Network is dominated by an adamant right-wing agenda that makes Fox News look like moveon.org. But we, the staff of the Hitler-Bush Political Action Committee, are in the process of possibly getting air time on that channel, so that we can educate all the ignorant homophobic students of that university.

Now on to our current issue:

Please support a benevolent effort to reform the educational system that George Hitler Bush has so brought to ruin and continue to support the No Child Left Behind law.

Quite possibly the best thing to happen to education since the arrival of the public school system, No Child Left Behind is part of our fundamental (but not fundy beliefs, mind you) convictions about government size and civic participation thereof.

The bill itself is supported by many of our allies in the war against George Hitler Bush and his 3rd Reich Republicans. This includes the bill's chief sponsor, Sen. Edward Kennedy. As he so beautifully put it:

"No Child Left Behind is not just a slogan. It’s a national commitment, inspired by our fundamental values and aspirations. It’s a promise to do all we can so that every American child receives the high-quality education he or she needs and deserves."

One of the many great things about the termination of the 1994 Republican Revolution was the establishment of Nancy Pelosi as speaker of the house. She, too, is an ally in helping to reform education through NCLB:

"No Child Left Behind was a promise to improve student performance, increase school accountability, and provide students with the resources they need to learn the skills crucial to their future success...Underfunding No Child Left Behind is one in a long line of Republican attacks on our country’s education system."

John Kerry, who should have defeated George Hitler Bush in the 2004 election but because of the vast right wing conspiracy did not, concurs. As he put it, and put it well:

"I voted for it; I support it; I support the goals. But the president has underfunded it by $28 billion. Right here in St. Louis, you've laid off 350 teachers. You're $150 -- excuse me, I think it's a little more -- about $100 million shy of what you ought to be under the No Child Left Behind Act to help your education system here. So I complain about that. I've argued that we should fully fund it."

Sen. John Kerry and intelligent Senators (Democrats) voted overwhelmingly for NCLB, with only 6 of the 49 Senate Democrats falling prey to the SS Republicans. 198 of the 204 House Democrats voted in favor of it as well.

Many, like those unsophisticated redneck fundies in Virginia and Connecticut, have tried to stop the implementation of this most benevolent act. But thankfully, again, help is on the way through liberal sectors, like our friends at the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP). Whenever an attack has been made on NCLB, they have risen to the challenge.

The NAACP also signed a joint statement which opened as follows:

"The undersigned education, civil rights, children's, disability rights, and citizens' organizations are committed to the No Child Left Behind Act's objectives of strong academic achievement for all children and closing the achievement gap. We believe that the federal government has a critical role to play in attaining these goals."

So with that in mind, we know for a fact that the No Child Left Behind (NCLB) Act is a just and proper way to reform education, better than anything that has come before. And if you disagree with us, then you are ignorant, homophobic, and--

Hey, hey stop, wait! Wait!

What the...? What is it now? Don't you understand we have an audience to educate here?

You idiot, we can't support No Child Left Behind.

Why not? It is perfectly compatible with liberal ideology about the size and purpose of government, namely stronger broader federal government instead of limited uncaring government.

Don't you know...George Hitler Bush signed the damn thing into law!

Oh, s***! I didn't even realize that! Alright, alright its okay. We'll just claim that only Nazi Republicans support such a homophobic bill.

But that obviously isn't the case, and it is kinda compatible with our views on the purpose of the federal government in relation to the states.

Damn, you're right. Um...gee, I really don't how to deal with this.

Well, let's look at it logically.

Okay, okay.

Sure, alot of liberals support it. But in the end Chancelor Bush did sign it into law.

Alright, that works. After all, anything Hitler Bush has done cannot be beneficial, he is the worst president we have ever had, bar none.

That's the spirit!

Thanks, man.

No problem.

No Child Left Behind is the worst thing to ever happen to education since the establishment of the public school system. It was passed by Fundy Republicans just to further indoctrinate a new generation to accept Inteligent Design. This law must be killed, and if you do not agree then you are ignorant, homophobic, and against interracial marriages.

Thought for the day:

"No Child Left Behind was a promise to improve student performance, increase school accountability, and provide students with the resources they need to learn the skills crucial to their future success."

--Nancy Pelosi.